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Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Lucy 3 months and PA summer

Shortly after Summer Conference I realized this was going to be a long summer by myself with the girls at home. Lucy has had issues (not eating, pooping, or sleeping) and I was completely overwhelmed with the thought of being by myself with the girls. So we made the decision to go to Cam's parent's house in PA. It's been really good for all of us. My in laws have helped tremendously with the girls, our friends have been great company, we've had a few date nights, and Cam has had options of where to study and prep for the semester!




Zoe is loving her time in PA. Aside from the undivided attention she gets from grandparents, she's been on many adventures around State College and is enjoying the beautiful PA summer weather. 




Cam and I have been on multiple date nights -- Seriously what a gift to these tired parents. One of our favorite past times is baseball and the very first week we were here Cam's parents watched the girls so we could have a night out watching a game. 


We've had lots of visitors since being here. Jeff and Sarah brought their little boy Luke and the bike carrier with them. Zoe's learning how to have friends ha! We love these friends of Cam's from college -- they care for us so well and are such great company.



We've had some great family time and I've even been able to start running (sloooowly). Cam's parents live on a golf course. One of Zoe's new "tricks" is to run straight for the green -- the picture below is from me returning from my run to Lucy crying and Zoe running straight for the green. So we took a selfie :)




These next couple pictures are of Lucy at 3 months. It's been pretty special to take her pictures in the same place we took Zoe's 3 month pictures. I'm slowly learning a lot from this little babe. She's been difficult from the get go (it may have something to do with having a big sister only 15 months older than her too). Since we've been in PA she's been a wonderful baby, but the lies creep in and tell me she's awful, our lives are going to be miserable forever, and I'm not worth anything since I can't even keep my babies from crying. 

This week I listened to an interview that mentioned the song "this little light of mine". The song was stuck in my head the rest of the day. So as I rocked Lucy before laying her down for a nap I subconsciously started sining this song to her.

As I realized the words I was singing (This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine -- Won't let Satan blow it out, I'm gonna let it shine) I started sobbing. Our little Lucy's name means light and those whispers that I've listened to are such lies.  The lies that I'm not good enough or Lucy isn't good enough. So this week I have started to fight for my little child of light and letting her shine.